Do you ever wish you could be on a game show and be the player who gets to choose what is behind Door #1, Door #2 or Door #3?...Oh, the thrill of what awaits you on the other side is exhilarating and nerve racking at the same time! What if you pick the wrong one? You just might get the amazing knife set behind the door you choose...while the other two have trips of a lifetime, a brand new car or even a cash prize! That would stink!
In my past, I have had choices that were clearly marked as to what was inside, and I still made the wrong pick...please tell me you can relate? The good news is...our life really isn't a lottery like that...we make good and bad choices just the same, but ultimately it's not left up to fate...we can design the life we live, and we do have the freedom to choose the path we take. Our life direction is often formed by the influence of the people we let in or keep out.
I recently stopped in to visit with my pastor, and for whatever reason, was intrigued that his office door was unmarked....no "pastor's study" or name plate mounted on the outside...just a plain brown door. I did find him on the other side in a beautifully decorated office:) I made a joke about the "top-secret" man behind the unmarked door, and...yes...he figured I might write a story about it...I couldn't resist.Our lives can often reflect that unmarked door. People see us on the outside and form opinions by what they see, but they truly have no idea what is on the inside until they are invited in. For all I knew, there was a janitor's closet behind that plain brown door! (lol) I will be the first to say, that I often make assessments about what I see before I have more information. I think that is normal for most of us. Based on our life experiences we filter our belief system or judgements by what we see first. We must be very careful to quickly dismiss these opinions and have an open heart and mind until we are "invited in." When we do this we allow ourselves to experience life and live life more abundantly through our relationships with others.
Life is, certainly, about building relationships with other people. As you create these relationships you will either "build" others up or "tear" them down. They can be encouraged or left feeling less than what God created them to be. We are all guilty of speaking before we truly think about the effects our words will have on others. We can apologize, but our words linger in the hearts of others long after we are gone. To truly live out our potential we must invite others into our life and at times keep some people out.
The visual picture of my pastors' unmarked door appealed to me because it reflected choice...in our personal life we choose who comes in and who stays out...I have often heard it said that we become like the five people we hang around the most...I do believe there is truth to that. The people that we spend the most time with have a great deal of influence on our thought process and our actions. Evaluate who you are spending the most time with, and see if they line up with the direction of God's desired life for you. That is an important step in freedom from other peoples' choices.
"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
I have decided to make a conscious effort not to judge what I see on the outside...until I am "invited in." And, even then...judgment is not my job. I can form opinions and preferences to create my circle of influence, but that is all. If you struggle with building positive relationships with others...you may want to open your "unmarked door" and invite a few people in to take a closer look. It does expose you to vulnerability at times and maybe even some criticism, but if you choose wisely who you will bring inside...you just might find that what you pour into the lives of others will come back into your own. We need people to help us where we are weak and others need our help where we are strong.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion." Ecclesiastes 4:9-10a
You will also find that in order to feel "freedom" to live as God intended...you must be truthful, honest and pure in all your intentions. In this day in age, I personally feel it is difficult for people to be honest with themselves...let alone with others. Fear of ridicule, judgement, or lack of receiving love may stand in the way. Low self-image often plays a role as well. Sometimes we even feel a little bit safer behind an unmarked door. Maybe in the past we have let too many people in and received more criticism than encouragement. Whatever the reason that causes dishonesty in your life...it will hold you captive and in bondage to your own freedom. Begin by speaking truth to yourself and others, and pray for people to come into your life to support your vision. And...every chance you get...pour life giving words into others. Because, life is full of love, joy and peace when you live cautious...yet free!
